GLASTONBURYOFTHEMIND

1 A friend once saw a Hell’s Angel banging the guy shagging his girlfriend over the head with a plank (the guy was inside his tent at the time). Moral sexual jealousy can lead to violence – all the way from the rout of Altamont, to the Vales of Avalon

2 The BBC TV 2007 coverage’s naughty sign off line was from Shirley Bassey, “I will come again,” said the 70 something dame. Who says that, though the tide may be high up round the mud flaps/flats tide, so to speak, ladies cant make the man in the boat stand up and cheer after the age of 60?

3 One year there was an extraordinary installation, a detailed wall of shame fence - erected to outline concerns of an international paedophile cover up involving the great and good. It was too treacherous to get up there this time round but I wonder, in 2007, the year The Who played there, if there was anything similar this year?

4 Steve saw the Broken Family Band and loved em. Steve also introduced me to my fave Glasto act. Unnamed two man break dancing team suitably attired, bandanas, hand movements, massive soundbox carried on the shoulder, unrelenting fearsome scowls, a rolled up mat, which, when the vibe is sufficiently chilled, they unroll and pop some moves upon. The killer touch is that the “straight” man foil to the main dude in the duo has his lurex leggings lowered at the arse crack to reveal a thong with - are you getting this fashion fans? – added suspender belts. I laughed so much I almost moved to the Bronx.

5 I learned something about journalism from my wife. 5 words (from Alex Turner) CAN make a character-revealing quote. The quote? “I’m excited, ladies and gentleman.”

6 Sunday night/Monday morning 3.30 in the kitchen, slept 6 to 12, spent an hour in Wells Sunday morning bought beer bread and bananas (small wonder, with so many men having now been turned into monkeys, they disappeared before mastication could begin). And Lo I did enter the cathedral just as Preacher Canon Patrick Woodhouse said a prayer for the festivalgoers and an unfeasibly long list of folk in the Congo. During my short stay I was not made to feel too at ease, or welcome, by the security man (Deacon?) watching my every move from the back of the hall. I guess a mud splattered festival refugee is more likely to make a raid on the communion wine. In his mind.  

7 Sunday - all I saw of Glastonbury today was on the TV screen. Kt Tunstall exclusive Beeb lounge new single done acoustic slot sounded strong, Tinariwen were magisterial and the duo that headlined the Avalon stage were ace. Caught up with the Lily Allen Gangsters Specials semi reunion. Terry Hall looked like he had not slept since arriving on the festival site on Wednesday night. Wednesday night in 2005, that is.

8 Onetime when we came to Wellands we walked up to the site when it was deserted and wandered round and found a stone circle and lay on hay bales under the sun in the empty Worthy Farm, totally empty, a sea of peace where revellers once roamed. So still and Rainford blew long and lonesome blues from his harmonica hanging in the air like a calming wraith of aural mist. Moral – Glastonbury moments can happen whether the festival is happening or not. Particularly at Worthy farm.

9 Conversation at our house on Sunday.

Him “C’mon we should get a move on and get up there.”

Her “Alright dear, my word you’re all bright and perky this morning.

Him”Err it is 3.30 in the afternoon dear.” Moral: it’s hard to get started at the same time as the Caprinas and Moquitos (lotsa fresh garden mint!!).

10 When I left James Endeacott’s outside the tent party in the backstage camping party  Saturday night  and I said “I love you man,” I distinctly heard some passers by say “he won’t even remember saying that in morning.” Well I do and I did and I do and I found we share a love object when I saw Pete Doherty on Jonathon Ross show, the first time I saw him move physically in the flesh I think I fell in love with him. I mean, seriously, the gangling boy holds himself with such poise; he’s the Juliette Binoche of rock. James said the first time he saw Pete, he fell in love with him too.

11 Id love to have seen CSS but I may have fallen in love with Lovefox so maybe its better I didn’t, love in the mud, from afar, may be too complicated.

12 Standing at the right angle, far enough back, at the right angle during The Magics set it seemed like the life-size inflatable of Frank Sidebottom was actually on song adding his presence to Love You Me Like You.

13 Somebody died on site – RIP, but be ready for the black humour, the sick joke and look on the brightside, you didn’t have to walk back to your tent in the mud and rain.

14 Words of wisdom part 253. John Fogerty, comparing the crowd at Glastonbury 2007 to those assembled at Woodstock 1969 “you are a lot better looking and smarter too.” We love you Johnny, you fucking hero!

15 The African quotient COULD be higher, the Jazz stage has got more conventional as years have got on. Oxfam may be a sponsor, beneficiary but a real farir trade would be more of African acts, a stand against the Geldof “only world music fans” go for it canard. Listen, people don’t get to see African bands live and that’s where their true flown high bred wonder takes hold, Toumani was under attended but those that got it got it good(ie bad). Just call him unforgettable.